I’ve thrown out a LOT of good stuff in the move, mainly because I didn’t want to deal with morons on Facebook Marketplace. My Mum’s churchy friends took a whole lot of stuff and all clothes have been donated but a lot of valuable bike and car parts have gone straight into the bin.
I have to clear everything out by the 15th of this month and the only stuff that’s left is a huge IKEA bookshelf, my King Furniture 3 seat sofa and a very solid and heavy entertainment unit. I decided to put these 3 items up on Facebook Marketplace for free in hopes someone would take them.
I very clearly stated in my advertisement that the 3 items were free, and that the items were in Maroubra. I’ve had a lot of interest with most people sending me a message to ask if the stuff is still available (a one click auto response from FB Marketplace, so lazy!). One guy said he’d take all 3 items at 6pm today, but it’s past 6pm now and he’s a no show (annoying as I don’t live at Maroubra anymore).
I’ve since scrambled to reply to everyone else that the items are still available and I’m getting questions like “will these items fit in my hatchback?” and “are these items actually free?” and “where are the items located?”.
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In 2014 on a trip to Japan I bought my first decent pair of Nikes, a pair of all black Midnight Fog Nike Flyknit Roshe Runs. They’re pretty damn dead now, but damn they were comfy AF for long walks (I had previously always worn flat soled shoes for driving which hurt my feet for walking as I have high arches). The Flyknit material is so breathable it’s almost as good as wearing sandals.
I thought I’d buy a new pair of sneakers. Of-course I couldn’t get the same exact pair (I tried), but I found something similar in the Nike Air Max Flyknit Racer. It’s got the same breathable Flyknit material, it’s all black, no massive Nike logo, but it does look a lot busier than the Roshe Runs (I’ll live with that). I had to order them via Nike.com as no-one in Australia sells size 8.5. They came in quick though, and feel… pretty strange initially due to the high heel, but I’m getting used to them and happy with the purchase!
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Viv has started working again and I was all set to go into the city to a nice hotel she’s booked for a shoot this past weekend but it turns out I needed to have proof of COVID-19 vaccination.
No worries right? Hop on the myGov web site, link my Medicare, this should be easy? NOT! It turns out that it’s fucking impossible. In the end I had to call, and guess what? Phone lines are only open on weekdays.
Weekend ruined. Why they don’t just give you what you need on your second jab, then and there, is beyond me. Fuck myGov!
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I’m not scared of anything, and after some thought… that’s really not a good thing. So many people in life lie about not being scared of anything, and the sooner they realise they’re full of shit, the sooner they succeed.
Resistance in life is an awesome thing, it’s the negative that helps you define the positive. I feel like I’ve succeeded in life. I’ve done the hard work and I’ve shown up more than a few times (despite every fibre of my being telling me to back out).
A few years back I got to a stage where I just wanted to hop off the ride, there was no resistance left. I was done. It wasn’t until the night where I actually tried to end my life that I realised I couldn’t do it. I walked out of my house, no shoes on and headed for the cliffs by the beach. I only managed to get a few houses down the street before breaking down in tears. I felt like the biggest wimp in the world. I was scared.
It’s been some time since then. I’ve gone through medication, therapy, gotten off the weed (I was smoking an ounce a week for a few years) and I’m now off the medication and back to square one.
I was in a 3-piece grunge rock band in high school and we had a song called F.I.A.U.J.T.D.I.A, which was short for Fucked It All Up Just To Do It Again. At the time I wrote it because I was chasing after girls who might have liked me, but before too long I’d lose my shit, get too full on and scare them away. I was stuck between learning a lesson, and just trying hard to accept myself for being a fuck up, so just keep on fucking up.
Right now I’m conscious of fucking it all up. I’m staring at a blank canvas. I want to go forwards not backwards, but I feel like in order to go forwards I need to redefine what I’m scared of in life. I need to find resistance in order to overcome it. I need to work hard to create opportunities that require me to show up.
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